You don’t need a song to tell you that life can be pretty hard for scientists (although thanks Wayne Coyne for understanding and for…umm, being professorily handsome with your wavy gravy hair). And nowhere is this truer than here in Australia.
But it could be worse…
Imagine if a Jerry Bruckheimer or Mark Burnett decided to do for science what they did for entrepreneurs, supermodels, bachelors and poor, hapless INXS?
Picture it...Auditions held around the country looking for talented lab rats desperate to get their big break in science on TV's ‘Australian Scientist’ or ‘Who wants to be NHMRC funded?’ After a rigorous training period (including lessons in makeovers and choreography), the final 12 will be culled down from thousands to compete in the ultimate contest. Each week contestants will need to complete a task – purify a protein, clone a gene, submit an ethics application, discover a new species, find a renewable energy source, etc. The audience gets to vote for their favourite contestant via text, except for some weeks when the placement of an intruder will result in a surprise eviction. The final three will get to go on an overnight conference with the judges, where they can determine if they really did feel a 'connection' with the contestant or it was just lust (what am i saying?). In the final episode, tasks will be performed outside the Sydney Opera House in a 3 hr extravaganza sponsored by Sony Xbox, hosted by Andrew G and that other guy. The lucky winner will win a one year contract from NHMRC and a publication in Nature, plus an on all expenses paid conference to Honolulu, Hawaii.
But it could still get worse…ever watched the TV show Gladiators?
6 comments:
i love your blog serenity now!!race for the prize kicks off our friday afternoon happy hour, we sit there saying: wayne's singing about US you know.
you could have members from a competitor's lab come in for a face off in the final episode...
ps: that other guy rawks (not andrewG!)
gosh, i love this idea ... especially the prospect of getting those poor unfortunate contestants to submit ethics applications (always fun!) in a limited amount of time. you should invent obstacles for them like faulty faxes or silly pen-pushers who notify you of even MORE signatures you have to procure, just when you thought you really were on the home strait ...
and btw, i saw andrew g outside flinders st station the other day. you know how they say that TV makes people look bigger? well, he looks as big a tosser in person as he does on the teev.
Scientiste Extraordinaire! That's great but...Man, you've been watching one too many reality programs-No more the Amazing Race for you!
kaluds - you sound like a battle-wearied veteran of applications....coming round the home stretch now though, right?
jfox - this is your mp3 that inspired this entry you know! and how cool is your lab? you even have a theme song for happy hour???
noooooooo!! don't deprive me of my weekly dose of the philiminator!!!!
Gladiators spawned all these terrible reality shows.... they must be destroyed in a battle of agility, brawn and skimpy outfits. Brains need not apply.
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